Richard was off tonight for muc deserved band practice (yes, I'm SO looking forward to the concert in two weeks!). The girls and I had good cuddle time on the couch, and bath time was fun, including some chases through the living room and attacks from the tickle monster. I was just taking Missy Violet to bed, when the mood went south.
Lily started a near epic tantrum after getting in trouble for destroying a puzzle book she has gotten from a family friend a few weeks earlier; there was moping, pouting, yelling, screaming, and insults involved, it was not pretty. I started with the ignore strategy, until the door smashing started, which is a big no-no in our house. I went in for a stern talk with her, discussing her jammies and why she had destroyed the book. She confessed that she just felt like being a bad girl, we tried to talk about destroying toys on purpose and what the consequences would be if she did it; that was whe she lost it again. At a point, it was enough; I let her know that her behaviour would have consequences and she would not be allowed to play with her inline skates for a while. Lound crying and "bad, bad Mami" followed. After she had calmed down, I tried to talk to her again, explaining to her that we need to work hard to earn money and she was showing a lack of respect if she was destroying things on purpose and taking everything for granted, even demanding more and more all the time.
She ended up wanting to be swaddled in her blanket and cuddling her to sleep. Right now, she's going through quite a difficult stage, which is also poses many challenges to us. I know that she wants to assert herself as an individual, and we try to teach her to voice her opinion. Moping doesn't help us understanding her, if she wants to contribute to the family decisions, she'll need to talk. She's starting to make some little improvements in this matter. Her moods and stubborness still remains a challenge. Usually, once her tantrum is over, she feels bad and needs quite a bit of consoling. She's a clever girl, a normal 5-year old, and so much her mommy's daughter, it's almost scary. Can't wait for the tantrum phase to be over for good!
PS: enjoying the "Mami I'm thirsty, Mami, I need to go potty, Mami, I want to cuddle, Mami, I'm not tired, Mami, I can't sleep"-game with Sweety, getting some extra-sweet cuddles in. Good night, everyone!
:( I can only imagine how tough this stage must be for you all. i hope it passes!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jen. I'm sure it will, and she's not like that all the time, but it's scary how well she already knows how to push buttons. Too much my daughter :-)
DeleteI LOVE THIS CLIP! lol Oh, my--the number of times this has echoed through my mind standing in the hallway outside the boys doors!! Dear, you made me smile tonight!
ReplyDeleteIsn't it awesome? I just had to post it, since Violet was playing the game. Hope she didn't learn a new word though ;-)
DeleteWe are having some tantrum issues as well, including little bouts of hitting. Nothing hard, since she doesn't aim well, but I want to teach our kids to express themselves a little more productively. But talking to a kid having a tantrum is like trying to have a rational conversation with a drunk person. Ain't gonna happen. ;)
ReplyDeleteShe usually doesn't hit. Lily and Violet fight sometimes, but unless someone is hurt, I try to let them figure their arguments out themselves. I agree, if she's in the middle of a tantrum, I usually just leave her until she calls (or cries) for me. Then she's receptive for talking again, and mostly feels bad for her actions.
DeleteI hope this stage passes quickly too, it makes things all the more difficult with other life stresses. It sounds like she sure can go on a little rampage.
ReplyDeleteI really like the clip :-)
Jak at The Cryton Chronicles & Dreams in the Shade of Ink
Thanks, Jak! We all had a very good, tantrum-free evening today. I really love our bed-time routine, spending some time just with her, without Violet, so I am honestly bummed when she choses bedtime to act out.
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