Friday, September 27, 2013

The Bravest Thing


Finish the Sentence Friday


The week is over, and it's weird, because it doesn't really feel like weekend yet. I was on sick leave from Tuesday on, and seriously wonder if I'll be back Monday. I'm going from feeling fine to bouts of elevated temperature, to sleeping all day long, to back feeling fine. It's annoying and obnoxious, and I really, really cannot wait to feel 100% again. Anyways, time still to link up with Janine and Kate for Finish The Sentence Friday; today's sentence:

The bravest thing I've ever done was...

... packing up our family and move to another country. Without any jobs lined up, with only my grandmother's mold-infested house to stay in, to say good-bye to friends who have become family, to leave a place that has become home to ensure a better future for our family.

And why? Because we felt that there was no real future for our family in Washington State. We loved the place, and we loved the people, but I was stuck in a job with little chance of improvment and a salary that JUST paid the bills when we were a family of three, and close to no job-options for Richard in that economic environment. Then the positive pregnancy test, the panic, the what-can-we-do's, and finally the decision to move back to my native Germany. Where we would have a place to stay at first (not knowing that this place would make us sick, but that's another story), some income from Kindergeld (a monthly stipend the government pays for each child) and Erziehungsgeld (yet another government stipend that is paid to parents for up to 14 months after a child is born), public health insurance, and the potential for a good future for our family.

It was scary back then, but today I am glad we did it. I was able to find a job that I probably would have never gotten in the U.S. I have full sick pay for up to 6 weeks in a row. I get additional sick days if the children are sick. We earn a better income, the kids go to better schools, and one day may have the chance to go to university, at a very low tuition fee. There is a lot more security and the knowledge that there is a network of social services and benefits that will support us in the worst case.

18 comments:

  1. Wow, I give you tons of credit for moving and doing what was best for your family. It truly does sound like you have better setup there then you could have ever had in Washington State. My hat goes off to you for this and definitely a very brave move in my eyes. And I am so hoping you are feeling better and just so sorry you are still fighting to get better now. Thinking of you and sending god thoughts your way!! :)

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    1. Thanks, Janine! I'm trying my best, we'll see Monday when I'm back with the Doc. Hope to keep improving over the weekend!

      The move was definitely hard, starting basically from scratch again, but I don't regret it. we still miss WA, but the support system is just so much better here..

      Hope you have a great weekend!

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  2. I agree that it was incredibly brave of you to move back to Germany. I used to work for a European company and was amazed at what wonderful support for sick leave and University so many EU countries have. I'm happy for you and your family that you chose to make such an important (and difficult at the time) move.

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    1. Thanks a lot, Kristi. It was a very scary decision, as I tend to imagine the worst case scenario of how things could go. But I'm so happy that everything worked out so smoothly. Just a month after the move I started working and a month later we moved to our apartment ;-)

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  3. I think it's absolutely amazing that you packed up your family and moved like that. :) You are an amazing person my friend! Hugs!

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    1. Thanks so much, Jen! I don't feel that great about making those decisions. There have been times when I regretted moving, when Lily had problems adjusting, when the family's support was less than non-existent and we looked at those wonderful people we left behind. But after all things put together, we believe it was the right thing to do...

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  4. That really was so brave! I'm glad it worked out for you all! :-)

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    1. Thank you, Susannah! Believe me, it was so scary, especially for a control freak like me, selling most of the things we had, etc.

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  5. Wow! That is brave! My hubby could "easily" get a three-year position in another country with his company, and we have talked about it, but the whole idea is terrifying. Leaving family, leaving friends, leaving our comfortable routines. I keep saying that "maybe when the kids are grown," but I honestly don't knwo if I would ever be brave enough! #FTSF

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    1. Thank you so much for stopping by, Lisa! My company also offers delegations to other countries, but it's not an option for us right now, either, because stability is so important for kids. But like you, we might opt for it once the kids are out of the house!

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  6. That's a really brave thing, and it sounds like it's done so much good for your family :) Well done you.

    Hope you feel better soon

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    1. Thanks a lot, Lizzie! I remember being about 5 months pregnant and talking to my dad on the phone. He tried to push me to apply for welfare as soon as we arrived, which I did not want to do at all.. I remember crying and not being sure about the whole thing at all any more. Today, I'm glad we managed everything, without a single trip to the welfare office ;-)

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  7. Wow. That is brave. I live 15 minutes from the city I grew up in, and my parents still live 15 minutes away from me. I would be terrified to move away. Brave, indeed! I'm so glad it has all worked out for you, and I so wish we had more of a social service state in the US.

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    1. I now live a lot closer to the town I grew up in than before my move, even though I hate going back there. Early in our marriage, hubby and I moved to the US for his work and built our life there, before we moved back to my native country.

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  8. Oh wow, that is a really courageous thing to do. I can totally see how that would be scary and intimidating. But it sounds like it has been the right choice for you. :)

    I sure hope you feel 100% soon and stay that way!!

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    1. Thanks so much, Kate! It was definitely the right thing to do for our family!

      I hope that I fell better, soon, as well ;-) Doesn't look that way unfortunately, can't wait to see the doctor tomorrow!

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  9. You're right - that's one of the bravest things I've ever heard. I was scared just moving five hours up the road, I can't imagine switching continents. But the beauty of it all is that you kept your family intact through the love that will always bind you together. Thanks for sharing this story!

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    1. We did it all for the family. We still miss WA, we still miss the people there, but we could have never offered all the things we have here to the girls had we stayed in the States. And we have truly learned: home is where the heart is, and my heart is my family.

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